Sunday, 20 November 2016

The 'pursuit' of so called happiness.

Happiness is something we are apparently always searching for, as if there is some huge emotional light at the end of some traumatic 'unhappy' tunnel that is apparently life. Its spoon fed to us that a lot of our lives are or should be spent searching for happiness. Whether that be in a partner, in our career, social life, or way of life. As if happiness is one huge pinpoint crescendo in our lives, when in my opinion its the complete opposite. I think the 'pursuit of happiness' is a load of bollocks, albeit the film is one of my favourites, but yeah its a definite no from me. For my A Level English Language coursework I essentially wrote a piece on how the main ideas behind self help are in essence, useless and the only way to really evaluate where you're at and move forward is by being realistic with yourself. 
I figure its the same with your happiness. We are told that happiness should come in large life affirming moments, and I am not denying this is true, but if you sit and wait for these huge moments to come along, you're depriving yourself of happiness in-between. In my eyes, you have to learn what makes you happy, in its smallest form and that way, you always have certain and specific ways of making yourself happy. 
I was on my way to Preston the other week to watch a gig, and it turned out I was inadvertently an hour or so early, so I figured I would find myself a service station en route and grab myself a drink. When I walked in, there was the standard Subway, Burger King, Starbucks and WH Smiths and instead of making a b-line for the Starbucks, I walked into the WH Smith. I'm a reader, always have been. I find a huge amount of joy in a book, I see reading as an escape when I am needing one, and a dream when I want one. I walked through, and thought, why not read? I picked up 'The Girl On The Train' (I did see the movie so I regrettably did it in the wrong order, oops) and THEN headed to my homeland of Starbucks. I sat in this empty service station Starbucks, next to the window onto the motorway, book and hot chocolate in hand and started to read. I forgot how easily I can spend my time reading somewhere peaceful. I saw people come and go, and I just sat a read. After a while of not really looking at my phone or the time, I realised this was bringing me an insane amount of happiness, and by that I mean, I was completely and utterly content with exactly what I was doing in that moment, and I guess for me, thats my definition of happiness. I have found that it has allowed me to have, I guess, more happiness.
I do try and make my own happiness, and this, alongside being independent is something I am always a huge advocate of. Other people and things around you can of course make you very very happy, but to avoid disappointment and unhappiness when things fall through or don't work out, if you have a foundation of happiness and things that make you happy that you have brought into your own life, then I think it helps keep you pretty sane. I have found it does anyway. 
I enjoy the surprises of new people in my life, I enjoy the happiness they bring alongside new experiences. However I know that if I make sure I focus my energy every now and again into doing something I know will make me happy regardless of what else may be going on, I can keep a level head. 
For example, right now. I am currently in Atlanta, flying home tomorrow afternoon. I've done a lot of lone wandering around on this trip, and I did this because I knew it was going to make me happy getting out and about when I otherwise would have been inside. So, this is what I have done almost everyday. This morning, I was inside longer than I wanted to be, so got my ass up and dressed and headed out. I found myself a Starbucks, and I am currently sat outside in the sun writing, and yes, I brought a book. This, to me, is a little brief period of happiness, brought about by myself, because I wanted it. I guess thats how I try and be a lot of the time. Sometimes I wake up, feeling uninspired and not wanting to be inside my own house, one of the downsides of working from home, so some days I may venture out to Manchester, or just down the road for somewhere else to work, a different environment, that makes me feel happy because I am out doing something. I may even take a day to go and spend time with someone, because my time is flexible I am lucky enough to be able to do this, and that also makes me happy. But, these are all things I am in control of, and I guess thats what I am trying to stress here. 
I write a lot in my blog posts, and trust me I could write a hell of a lot more, but if I am honest I don't really like the idea of boring you with my writing, but if you don't mind my ramblings on, then do let me know below as it'll give me a good gage as to whether I can keep writing or whether to reign it in a little from time to time...
What I am really trying to say here, to you. Is that, I know we wait for these huge momentous occasions in our lives to give us this happiness we crave, and I am sure they happen to everyone eventually in one way or another. In the meantime though, I encourage all of you to actively sought out your own version of happiness, in its smallest and most simple form, and hold onto it and make it happen as often as you need. Whether it be reading, or writing, or shopping, or facetimeing the person you love, or catching up with your best friend, or eating pringles (we all do it), whatever it is just try and find it, as its your best friend and I promise you it'll keep you sane. I find wonder in anything new, hence why I could walk for miles and miles just to see new things and experience everywhere I visit to the best of my abilities. I find happiness in being super content, both alone and sharing that peace with people I hold dear and close to me, and I'm all set. 
I hope you enjoyed this post, and I haven't rambled on too much. Just take some time to focus on the little things and figure out what it is that you enjoy doing most. 


H x


  1. Another amazing post, thank you.
    Ps: I love the rambles x

  2. i love the ramble, don't stop!
    (ps. miss your youtube videos) x

  3. I love your blog posts recently! You deffo suit writing about lifestyles and mentalhealth. You should break up your blogs with more photos tho

  4. Just got my check for $500.

    Sometimes people don't believe me when I tell them about how much money you can earn by taking paid surveys online...

    So I show them a video of myself getting paid over $500 for doing paid surveys to set the record straight.


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