Friday, 24 October 2014

A letter to Gerard Way

I found this on the notes of our old iPad, it made me cry. You probably won't get the sentiment behind it but reading it made me happy. Forever a killjoy. 

Confessions to start, I spent an unnecessary amount of time thinking of how to start this letter because frankly, it feels like I've known you a lifetime. The irony behind that is insane but the sentiment to me is strong. I don't really know the sole reason for wanting to write to you, I just knew I wanted to, and sadly, I know this is realistically my only way to reach you. 
Are introductions even in order in this context? If so, then I'm Hayleigh, and it's wonderful to make your metaphorical acquaintance.  This letter is a thank you, of sorts, for many reasons if I'm honest. The amount of support and aid that you provided me with when I needed the most is something I will always hold dear and never forget. Music to me has and always will be my main source of escape from the belittling world we all seem to co-exist in. Everyone has their own way of reaching their inner selves and finding a way of escaping the taunting whispers of every day stress, but this has always been my way. Yourself and MCR always aided me in doing so, and I am thankful. You made me who I am today, when going through the stages in my life where everything was unstable and everything felt like the end of the world and I was shadowed in a melodramatic ideology that everything and everyone was against me, I always found solace in you. I am also in debt to you for helping me come out of places I never should have submerged into, places I never wish to and hope for anyone to visit. You're ever so strong and that to me was something to aspire to be, you are, in my eyes the portrait of things getting better. Providing me with hope made everything feel that little bit better, that I just had to stick it out till the end of the next song, or the end of the album. Writing this looking around my room at all the torn and battered revenge posters and countless others hanging shabbily by one corner via some decaying blue tac, it makes me smile because I remember putting them up, and dancing round my room not giving a care in the world because that's what was making me happy. The freedom in which you provided me with to be myself no matter what negativity I got from peers for doing so, and that's why I'm like I am today. 
I no longer cower to the idea of standing out in a crowd, I embrace it for allowing me to express who I am as an individual human being alone and in great company simultaneously. And for this, I am ever in your debt.


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